In the ChiPy Ultimate Language Shootout, shooters have 5 minutes to extol the virtues of their chosen (non-Python) language. For the event in October, I chose the Atmel AVR flavor of assembly because I could torture the definition of "ultimate" to point unequivocally to it, plus I could come up with a fun theme around it. Someone declared they would represent Babbage's Analytical Engine, taking an even lower-level tack that could undercut my position, but they were a no-show.
Prepared with my 100% undeniable facts and smooth delivery, I ended up winning the day. View the PDF.